expectations

I don't know if anyone who is reading this is as much of a Stephenie Meyer fan as I am (except for B, whose devotion to all things Meyer-related eclipses [haha] my addiction). This sounds far too dramatic, but I've almost breathlessly been awaiting the release of Breaking Dawn, Meyer's fourth (and supposedly final) book in her Twilight series. August 2nd has kind of been a beacon on the horizon during an otherwise tough summer -- in a nutshell, yesterday was a big day for this reader.

So I started reading ... and reading ... and reading ... and reading (I didn't turn off the lights 'til well after midnight). The first few chapters were captivating. For those of us who have been following Bella and Edward's love story, it was exactly the dream that we'd been waiting for -- pure bliss.

Then (insert dramatic music), things took a decidedly unexpected turn -- something began to unfold that I did not see coming, which is usually the mark of a great plot, right? Well, I'll be honest: reading through it was agonizing. So much so that I had this queasy, sick feeling throughout the 300 or so pages that it took to get through the "event". It reminded me of how I felt throughout most of Meyer's Host -- "This is disturbing. How did her mind come up with this?" To put it mildly, I was heartbroken.

But ... because of my 'In Stephenie I Trust' outlook, I kept reading. But I've got to be honest ... it was HARD. The more I read, the more I shook my head. What was she thinking?! How could she do this to me?! All of my favorite characters were there, but it was all wrong! Had Stephenie fallen and hurt her head while writing? Had she encountered a rebellious stage in her own personal career that she was now purging through Breaking Dawn? I don't know what to say, other than I was sort of mindlessly following the book along last night, not really grasping what I was reading...

... until page 387. And, coincidentally, the title of that chapter is New. Just when I thought I couldn't make it through the second half of the book, it was like an oasis in the desert.

I've now entered the second half of the book, and although things aren't perfect, and I still don't really see where Steph is heading with all of this madness, I'm starting to smile again. Things are starting to feel sort of right again in the world of Forks, Washington.

So, onward I now read. What a wild ride it's been so far. It's only 9:00 a.m., and I woke up feeling like I'd been hit by a truck. Wish me luck. I'm goin' in ....